If that was your dad, he is hot
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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