In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
