So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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