Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
