Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
