it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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