And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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