If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize