Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Randomize
