This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
high people should be assigned attendants
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
