dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
