So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
