i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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