not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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