with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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