So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
