Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
