Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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