Texts From Last Night

(708): View more from Illinois

Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.

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What. The. Fuck

Submitted by adanrott on May 14, 10 at 11:09am

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Go fuck yourself san diego

Submitted by hooah33 on May 14, 10 at 11:34am

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Jump out the window, suck a dude dick.

Submitted by maxzilla1 on May 14, 10 at 11:21pm

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- suck my own dick! eat some chicken strips!
  
  Submitted by TheNewGuy03 on May 15, 10 at 4:05pm
  
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Why would you do that even if you were drunk?

Submitted by LynnZee on May 14, 10 at 11:37am

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Keep it classy San Diego!

Submitted by WorstTextEver on May 14, 10 at 11:33am

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Red Rocket....Nice!!

Submitted by Rubes_Carnies on May 14, 10 at 11:50am

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Holy shit. Lol

Submitted by kmbchamp on May 19, 10 at 10:40pm

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This is from Illinois people.... Woot mokena!!

Submitted by beckym on May 14, 10 at 4:32pm

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Who the heck told you you're even remotely funny or creative? Kill him.

Submitted by PinkyEpicOopsies on May 15, 10 at 5:20pm

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Soo gross

Submitted by bsrit on May 14, 10 at 7:17pm

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i definately think i know who that is. :p

Submitted by tater_salad on May 15, 10 at 10:49pm

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and who rejects a blowjob..?

Submitted by fd1 on May 14, 10 at 9:09pm

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this is a fucking joke right? nobody, sober, or drunk should ever.. i mean EVER.. attempt to felete a dog..

Submitted by underagehangover on May 14, 10 at 4:22pm

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That's soo sick but yet very funny hahaha

Submitted by kenewiwe on May 17, 10 at 12:59am

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Another cat/dog lame post. How does this even get on here?

Submitted by Michguy on May 14, 10 at 12:24pm

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Someones Desperate..

Submitted by FratHard on May 14, 10 at 12:03pm

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Sick

Submitted by Carma1369 on May 14, 10 at 7:56pm

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San Diego area codes are 619 and 858.

Submitted by Anonymous on May 14, 10 at 11:48am

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rejected! haha.

Submitted by _bbycakes on May 14, 10 at 8:16pm

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Yea whoever said this was San Diego is a fucking retard

Submitted by Anonymous on May 14, 10 at 12:03pm

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- ... its a quote from Anchorman
  
  Submitted by PropagandaPanda on May 14, 10 at 1:36pm
  
  90 105
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Swallow sadness. Send some faxes.

Submitted by Chalmers15 on May 14, 10 at 10:30pm

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Canine cockblock -- epic fail!

Submitted by cfreymarc on May 14, 10 at 7:33pm

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Wowzers in my trowzers

Submitted by taco_del_paco on May 14, 10 at 3:28pm

90 113
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I want to marry 10:30

Submitted by Anonymous on May 15, 10 at 1:58am

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Animal cruelty!!! You should be lit on fire you sick piece of shit!!! God I fucking hate you people!!!

Submitted by maynard on May 15, 10 at 2:28am

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- I'm pretty certain this is the opposite of animal cruelty.
  
  Submitted by shotgunsmile09 on May 15, 10 at 2:27pm
  
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  - yeah but the dog can lick his own nuts, and do a better job of it
    
    Submitted by FuckTheDumbShit on May 15, 10 at 4:38pm
    
    63 91
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Morgan Hofmann. Woodstock, Illinois. That's who this text should be about.

Submitted by Kaiser on May 15, 10 at 11:43pm

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4:22 it's FELATE... Fucking idiot

Submitted by ItsB on May 15, 10 at 12:22pm

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- actually, it's "fellate."
  
  Submitted by TheNewGuy03 on May 15, 10 at 4:04pm
  
  69 107
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Poor dog, at least he got away. If this is real, that chick is a whole new level of slutty.

Submitted by Chuck_Bass_FTW on May 15, 10 at 12:02pm

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This is Illinois, not San diego.

Submitted by heyychitown on May 15, 10 at 7:34am

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This is so stupid.

Submitted by marylouuu on May 15, 10 at 2:37am

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Representing Illinois. :D

Submitted by heyychitown on May 15, 10 at 12:00am

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Whoever said this was fake is retarded. I saw this exact thing on the internets and the dog seemed to enjoy it as mush as the girl did!

Submitted by Anonymous on May 14, 10 at 4:51pm

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Hmm I'm not so proud to be from 708 anymore...

Submitted by RussiaSovietsYou on May 14, 10 at 6:13pm

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No shit Sherlock

Submitted by Anonymous on May 14, 10 at 1:49pm

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Take that PETA!!

Submitted by waymore on May 14, 10 at 8:00pm

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That's just sick.

Submitted by Carma1369 on May 14, 10 at 4:20pm

82 118
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I really hope alcohol had a lot to do with this.. Otherwise, just... No... That's nasty :/

Submitted by TimMc333 on May 14, 10 at 11:06am

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- But with alcohol... it's acceptable?
  
  Submitted by JackBerton on May 14, 10 at 11:55am
  
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  - yes .... with alcohol anythings acceptable
    
    Submitted by gliohkj on May 14, 10 at 8:19pm
    
    82 76
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    bullshit
    
    Submitted by TheNewGuy03 on May 15, 10 at 4:02pm
    
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Whoever said San Diego is a moron. Unfortunately this is where I live. *sigh* thank you cook county for showing an exuberant(sp.) amount of intelligence.

Submitted by BrazilianJuJitsu on May 14, 10 at 1:35pm

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I'm a dog! So can I get a blowjob, or do I need more fur?

Submitted by Chucklez421 on Oct 6, 11 at 11:43pm

62 81
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Kris?

Submitted by marey on May 15, 10 at 2:05pm

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Adanrott-- agreed.

Submitted by pichu180 on May 14, 10 at 11:28am

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...The Fuck?!?!?!

Submitted by MarineAggie on May 14, 10 at 11:27pm

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I Gave my dog a blow job. Several times.

Submitted by myslimsoccer on May 18, 10 at 3:19pm

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I've decided "thenewguy" is a Dumbass. Just thought I'd return the favor of excesive trolling to try and look smart.

Submitted by DasZwerg on May 15, 10 at 10:26pm

70 114
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(708): View more from Illinois

Comments

Submitted by adanrott on May 14, 10 at 11:09am

Submitted by hooah33 on May 14, 10 at 11:34am

Submitted by maxzilla1 on May 14, 10 at 11:21pm

Submitted by TheNewGuy03 on May 15, 10 at 4:05pm

Submitted by LynnZee on May 14, 10 at 11:37am

Submitted by WorstTextEver on May 14, 10 at 11:33am

Submitted by Rubes_Carnies on May 14, 10 at 11:50am

Submitted by kmbchamp on May 19, 10 at 10:40pm

Submitted by beckym on May 14, 10 at 4:32pm

Submitted by PinkyEpicOopsies on May 15, 10 at 5:20pm

Submitted by bsrit on May 14, 10 at 7:17pm

Submitted by tater_salad on May 15, 10 at 10:49pm

Submitted by fd1 on May 14, 10 at 9:09pm

Submitted by underagehangover on May 14, 10 at 4:22pm

Submitted by kenewiwe on May 17, 10 at 12:59am

Submitted by Michguy on May 14, 10 at 12:24pm

Submitted by FratHard on May 14, 10 at 12:03pm

Submitted by Carma1369 on May 14, 10 at 7:56pm

Submitted by Anonymous on May 14, 10 at 11:48am

Submitted by _bbycakes on May 14, 10 at 8:16pm

Submitted by Anonymous on May 14, 10 at 12:03pm

Submitted by PropagandaPanda on May 14, 10 at 1:36pm

Submitted by Chalmers15 on May 14, 10 at 10:30pm

Submitted by cfreymarc on May 14, 10 at 7:33pm

Submitted by taco_del_paco on May 14, 10 at 3:28pm

Submitted by Anonymous on May 15, 10 at 1:58am

Submitted by maynard on May 15, 10 at 2:28am

Submitted by shotgunsmile09 on May 15, 10 at 2:27pm

Submitted by FuckTheDumbShit on May 15, 10 at 4:38pm

Submitted by Kaiser on May 15, 10 at 11:43pm

Submitted by ItsB on May 15, 10 at 12:22pm

Submitted by TheNewGuy03 on May 15, 10 at 4:04pm

Submitted by Chuck_Bass_FTW on May 15, 10 at 12:02pm

Submitted by heyychitown on May 15, 10 at 7:34am

Submitted by marylouuu on May 15, 10 at 2:37am

Submitted by heyychitown on May 15, 10 at 12:00am

Submitted by Anonymous on May 14, 10 at 4:51pm

Submitted by RussiaSovietsYou on May 14, 10 at 6:13pm

Submitted by Anonymous on May 14, 10 at 1:49pm

Submitted by waymore on May 14, 10 at 8:00pm

Submitted by Carma1369 on May 14, 10 at 4:20pm

Submitted by TimMc333 on May 14, 10 at 11:06am

Submitted by JackBerton on May 14, 10 at 11:55am

Submitted by gliohkj on May 14, 10 at 8:19pm

Submitted by TheNewGuy03 on May 15, 10 at 4:02pm

Submitted by BrazilianJuJitsu on May 14, 10 at 1:35pm

Submitted by Chucklez421 on Oct 6, 11 at 11:43pm

Submitted by marey on May 15, 10 at 2:05pm

Submitted by pichu180 on May 14, 10 at 11:28am

Submitted by MarineAggie on May 14, 10 at 11:27pm

Submitted by myslimsoccer on May 18, 10 at 3:19pm

Submitted by DasZwerg on May 15, 10 at 10:26pm

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