check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
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