Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
where does the pee come out of this thing
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
