i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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