Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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