I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
