I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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