well you can't waste a boner
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
