found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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