Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
