R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
