I must be too annoying 4 u.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I need to calm my uterus...
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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