I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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