This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
