? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
