well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
