my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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