Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
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