in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
