she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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