Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
