I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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