He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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