Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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