Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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