Hey man sorry I got all grabby
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
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