I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Who died my cat blue again?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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