Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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