weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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