Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Randomize