I want to make a zoo with you.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
my god I love twenty year old dicks
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
