So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Can I color on your dick again?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
