and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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