I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
So vagazzling was a success
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
